tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33506871715814392592024-03-19T07:30:01.686-05:00I ❤ 2 Eat: Food, Fitness and Other Adventurespebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.comBlogger390125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-64446258528798705512017-01-05T22:57:00.000-06:002017-01-05T22:57:15.197-06:00Minimalism<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh45Vh5CYwdMvSkwwAWTeGZ4eYf4YR0ocvEIEWibfM526RPyqQliKqhYRblQFB_OBkB0TM0GfVEKbpqnpQD0qyC2fxosM4AwXBH4ITynlbWWqtmGvkTRTq0odzvSkjOAhz9FijKOzFNvSI/s1600/minimalist-room.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh45Vh5CYwdMvSkwwAWTeGZ4eYf4YR0ocvEIEWibfM526RPyqQliKqhYRblQFB_OBkB0TM0GfVEKbpqnpQD0qyC2fxosM4AwXBH4ITynlbWWqtmGvkTRTq0odzvSkjOAhz9FijKOzFNvSI/s320/minimalist-room.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
When you try you go to sleep early, but you can't sleep at all, you end up writing. I just wrote an email to a group of ladies I work with, posted an old draft to this blog, and here's a blog post about a documentary we were watching on Netflix today called <a href="http://minimalismfilm.com/" target="_blank">Minimalism: A Documentary about the Important Things</a>.<br />
<br />
Truth be told, we aren't currently minimalists. I'm a spender. Unfortunately, we are those people who have Amazon boxes coming to our doorstep several times a week, and then remained unopened for an unspecified period in some cases. I'm not a hoarder, and I like to donate or sell things periodically. Still, we have way more clothes than we realistically need, and with a little one, there are likely more toys than she regularly plays with.<br />
<br />
Some of the guys in the documentary travelled months with just a duffel bag or two. Others lived in <a href="http://thetinylife.com/what-is-the-tiny-house-movement/" target="_blank">tiny houses</a> (I didn't realize there was a "tiny house movement"). As we watched the film, I learned something new about R - apparently he thinks tiny houses are super cool, and he would love to have one (*mind blown*). I couldn't do a tiny house. I'm pseudo-claustrophobic, meaning, small spaces <b>sometimes</b> make me feel suffocated, but not all the time - I'm not sure about when it does and when it doesn't, so I won't say I'm fully claustrophobic (for example, I'm okay with elevators and planes, but the idea of a tiny house itself makes me feel like I'd need to run outside every 5 minutes).<br />
<br />
The documentary talked about how decluttering their lives, and minimizing the number of things they own has in turn enriched the lives of these individuals. It talks about fast fashion, 52 fashion seasons a year, and the need to buy more, more, more at the drop of a hat, and how money really can't buy happiness. I can identify with much of that. What really struck me is the decluttering, though.<br />
<br />
I seriously need to declutter. My closet has an overwhelming number of things, and I never have anything to wear. You see people like Mark Zuckerburg and Steve Jobs with oodles of money wearing the same things everyday, and simplifying their lives, and I actually really admire that. I'm very much a girl, however, and one with a corporate job. I know I can't wear the same thing everyday and get away with it, or feel "right" about it. At the same time, I know I have favorites that I like to wear to work, <i>and </i>my work dress code is now jeans and tennis shoes every day of the week, so really, I have no excuses not to minimize.<br />
<br />
But what about the sarees? If you've posted a picture of a saree at an event on Facebook, then you're never going to wear that again, right? 😜😜 Bengali women, probably all subcontinental women (yes, huge generalization, sorry don't kill me, I consider myself part of this group, despite being feminist minded), love their outfits and their goyna (jewelry), and love talking about them nonstop. I likely have more sarees than I need, similar to work clothes. And my mom keeps bringing more. And she has such great taste in those traditional sarees. She always knows what I like. Always the right colors. I'm going to have to ask her to stop? Ugh, how?<br />
<br />
Before I digress much further, I might need to think about simplifying my life a little bit in 2017. I never really outlined any resolutions for 2017 because I don't have much more than the usual (eat right, exercise, be kinder). But I could look into decluttering. And potentially intermittent fasting (more on this later, if I do it).<br />
<br />
So what would decluttering look like for me at a very high level?<br />
<br />
1. Cut down to essentials that fit for my work clothes.<br />
2. Ask Mom to stop buying new sarees for me and just recycle her old ones.<br />
3. Reduce my Amazon purchases other than presents.<br />
4. Stop buying workout clothes (I already have more than enough to last me 2 weeks of 5 workout days)<br />
5. <b>Throw away unnecessary paperwork </b> - I don't even want to go into this. There's so much paperwork around the house, it's not even funny.<br />
<br />
And let's not go into the toys and the kid's clothes too-small and the shoes...oh...my...shoes...<br />
<br />
Ok, this is going to be hard. And I really don't subscribe to the minimalist policy as much as I likely should. I do, however, think there might be a longer term benefit to living smaller - it's hard to live small in Texas!<br />
<br />
I do like a challenge though.... 😉<br />
<br />
Goodnight!! 👋💖<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-43259216299302897542017-01-05T22:19:00.001-06:002017-01-05T22:19:37.685-06:00Little I's First Ever Report Cards<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I drafted this post nearly 2 years ago now, but never posted. So here's an old-is-gold post for the record.<br />
<br />
..........<br />
<br />
We started daycare over a month ago, but here are her first few report cards. :) Both R & I love hearing about what she enjoys each day. <br />
<br />
"We are so excited to have [Little I] in our class! She enjoyed doing tummy time with her friends."<br />
<br />
"[Little I] did great at tummy time! She enjoyed reading the book "Bug"!"<br />
<br />
"We are working on the sign 'milk' with [Little I] today!"<br />
<br />
"[Little I] enjoyed playing peek-a-boo and playing with the dolls."<br />
<br />
"[Little I] enjoyed being cuddled and talked to today. She was talking so much, it was super cute!"<br />
<br />
"[Little I] had fun playing with toys by the mirror."</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-61768903012029466672017-01-04T16:18:00.000-06:002017-01-04T16:24:06.314-06:002016, Toward Better Communication<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsnkVVIaQ8VNYjIqRnX4sekIFU5irHZyIaUnKhA0gVdNJbIDcdV6wMrCHdA_3xbNhNWaXeDjEN8fB8oJrcP3IbXVLLI_lvNE9Nn53fEnJHqMRo-lDwDQ3mHytP4pe5tHeJT41QbmQYzYk/s1600/fullsizeoutput_2e7.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="310" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsnkVVIaQ8VNYjIqRnX4sekIFU5irHZyIaUnKhA0gVdNJbIDcdV6wMrCHdA_3xbNhNWaXeDjEN8fB8oJrcP3IbXVLLI_lvNE9Nn53fEnJHqMRo-lDwDQ3mHytP4pe5tHeJT41QbmQYzYk/s400/fullsizeoutput_2e7.jpeg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Taken by me on a hike in Idaho, July 2016</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Yes, I haven't written in almost a year, but I like my yearly reflection documented in a post. It helps me look back at what I've been learning, and hopefully to continue applying what I've learned.<br />
<br />
2016 is the year my little girl started communicating in full sentences. It's hard to believe now, that it was only a few months ago, around her 2nd birthday, that Little I started saying things that were more than just a few words here and there. We now have full conversations with her, she asks how our days were when she sees us, says "I love you", and gives us loving hugs and kisses without even being asked to. Her favorite person besides her parents is her aunt, Pichki, whom she lovingly calls Taee, and she can't wait to see her Taee and Khalu whenever she has the opportunity. Along with better communication, of course, comes the ability to say "No" and become a picky eater, which is tough for a mom to handle, but we're working through it. We learned to communicate better between the three of us as Little I grew threw the year, and despite ups and downs that are usual with a toddler, as they learn to handle their emotions, it's been a really great year for her and us with respect to communication. We are really enjoying watching her personality blossom, her thoughtfulness, even at the age of 2, and her general good humor and wonderful nature. Clearly, we're first-time parents...haha. :D<br />
<br />
I have also been consistently active in 2016. Much more than I expected, and for good measure. I'd just slacked off the previous year, and put on a bunch of weight with the stress of going back to work after maternity leave, emotional eating, and just eating junk without reason. While I didn't do so well with the eating part in 2016 either, I did <i>better</i>, and I did <b>much better</b> when it came to fitness. I joined 9Round, a kickboxing gym, and continued to go to my regular gym for cardio workouts. I had a really great workout year, and even lost 9% body fat, which was a big landmark, although only a few pounds. I even started an Instagram account (@fitmasala) to document progress, workouts, recipes, whatever I feel like. :) I'm happy with the overall 2016 results, and look forward to continuing to be active in 2017!<br />
<br />
One thing that I identified as an ongoing, forever-goal is to become a better person. I started reading <a class="g-profile" href="https://plus.google.com/106817725740772997437" target="_blank">+Brene Brown</a> in the early part of 2016 and I need to say that she has changed the way I look at life. Her shame and vulnerability research, and her words about getting curious about your emotions have started me on a lifelong journey that I think will make me a better person. 2016 was also a year of reading for me, that I have missed dearly in the last few years. I had a goal to read a book a month, which is more than I can usually handle, given the stresses of being a toddler mom, and a working mom. I read almost 10 books (hoping to finish the 10th this week :)), almost half of which were Brené Brown's, along with some fiction and other non-fiction as well. I didn't end up writing a lot this year, and this post in itself is somewhat rushed, but I have learned a ton about myself in reading Dr. Brown's books, and have shared much of my love for her work with friends, family and colleagues alike. I'm a super fan! :) R and I have shared much about what I have been reading, and feel that our own communication is getting better as a married couple. If you're interested in a full reading list, <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/4607555-irina?shelf=read" target="_blank">GoodReads </a>page.<br />
<br />
On the work front, I got a promotion in 2016, with a ton more responsibility, a new team, and lots of exciting new things to do. It's now been six months, and there's no slowing down with this job, but it's all good at this time. Wish me luck!<br />
<br />
While I start 2017 off <i>without</i> a bang, and basically bed ridden from food poisoning (or stomach flu, I don't know which) for the first few days of the year, I'm hoping this year will be even more about communicating, growing and learning together with R, Little I, and others.<br />
<br />
Wishing all of you a great 2017 and hope you all have a successful, joyous, and healthy year ahead!</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-5170878396491438882016-02-16T22:41:00.004-06:002017-01-04T15:49:34.412-06:00Defining Success<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
“<i>To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent
persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest
critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty. </i><br />
<br />
<i>To find the best in others; to give one’s self; to leave the world a
bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed
social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung
with exaltation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you
have lived—this is to have succeeded.</i>” -Stanley/Emerson/Wiggam (?)<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX6QEgcRHag4XGvkC0nlBJ5nLys9y-9ATyFHfSws5ouVwfRnEY-a1Hhvbj2VN-379OBI1w5hysrKnBLmgdzd2vbetuqWWM-rrAqei7i4imVz4_2gTr_XS1W0c7pKz5v7prSzAYpw_XPXU/s1600/laugh.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX6QEgcRHag4XGvkC0nlBJ5nLys9y-9ATyFHfSws5ouVwfRnEY-a1Hhvbj2VN-379OBI1w5hysrKnBLmgdzd2vbetuqWWM-rrAqei7i4imVz4_2gTr_XS1W0c7pKz5v7prSzAYpw_XPXU/s320/laugh.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWTiNF1grnwF_VLALtgeNYfX4oZw2cjY8Q89D8a3ZE2FGsZCVAhOkzPR_qaHiMVa8K64s-gnS1ydvTHH77bYT0TZd9mERqDT1-PLkhNNkKzR_cSeETY1KocSeh6BUgmLTpmFLfDq4L_QlR/s1600/laugh-with-abandon_14-things-adults-can-learn-from-children.jpg" target="_blank">Source Link</a></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
I was trying to find a source for the above quote, but it looks like there is debate over the original writer of this paragraph. See <a href="http://quoteinvestigator.com/2012/06/26/define-success/" target="_blank">Quote Investigator</a> for more information. <br />
<br />
This might be one of the most powerful quotations I have ever come across about success. It's not only about success, however, it's about life in general, and it's a pity I can't pin it to any one person's ingenuity. <br />
<br />
Read it again, read it a third time, fourth and fifth...<br />
<br />
I am not a quotations person. I never remember what anyone says when it comes to "famous quotes." I mix metaphors, mix quotes, and I just don't keep any of that straight. I will, however, be attempting to memorize the above and keep it etched in my memory forever (somehow, or not, but I will try).<br />
<br />
Why?<br />
<br />
Because <u><b>success</b></u> is a concept that we <i>all </i>struggle with at some point in our lives, and we try to define success in so many different ways.<br />
<br />
Or, if you're like me, you try to define how what you have done has failed (or <i>you're a failure because xyz happened</i>). I failed as a mother because this, I failed as a manager because that, I failed as a wife...sister...daughter because god-knows-what-else.<br />
<br />
More often than not, I focus on the negative, and I forget all that makes my life of almost-thirty-five-years so incredibly successful as defined above...<br />
<br />
1. <b>I appreciate beauty</b> - in children, in nature, in women, in men. In family, in my work, in my every day life. <br />
<br />
2. <b>I have won the affection of my beautiful child</b> - every smile, every cuddle, every "mwah" is a reward for that success.<br />
<br />
3. <b>I find the best in others </b>- in everyone I meet, this is my one goal. Makes me naive at times because I trust in others too much, but that's only because I'm looking for the best in them at all times.<br />
<br />
4. <b>I have sung with exaltation</b> - who hasn't?<br />
<br />
5. <b>I have endured the betrayal of false friends</b> - in my naivete while trusting others. <br />
<br />
I can laugh more, I can do more to ensure that at least one life breathes easier because of me, I can continue to try to earn the respect of intelligent persons, and simply breathe easy.<br />
<br />
How <u><b>successful</b></u> are you?<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-31392069426129450492016-01-03T21:42:00.003-06:002016-02-11T23:10:27.071-06:002015, A Year of Growth<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU86H6iGgqirqFTG8YqprDMZtSFezvnkL5BuBlr_OcGCgfqaTmicOqiBe_OMu-B10kucZoGH8CQbN9c9HT4DvIWm_L3DStlMPpSDhdxP212w8D2wk4QXreZ9-GtCfws27vCQ3IVxA48Oc/s1600/IMG_7013.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU86H6iGgqirqFTG8YqprDMZtSFezvnkL5BuBlr_OcGCgfqaTmicOqiBe_OMu-B10kucZoGH8CQbN9c9HT4DvIWm_L3DStlMPpSDhdxP212w8D2wk4QXreZ9-GtCfws27vCQ3IVxA48Oc/s400/IMG_7013.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dallas Arboretum, Summer 2015</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Can every year be a whirlwind year? That's what I find myself thinking these days - every year goes by faster and faster as I age.<br />
<br />
2015, however, has been a landmark year. First full calendar year as a mother, lots of ups and downs as is natural for such a year, some heartbreaking losses in the family, and many, many opportunities for growth.<br />
<br />
It's appropriate, therefore, to take a few minutes in the first week of 2016, to reflect and analyze how the year went, what I learned, what went well, what didn't go so well, and everything in between. The reason I usually like to take some time to reflect is not to live in the past, but be able to move forward knowing that, hopefully, tomorrow will make me a better person than I was yesterday. Reflection is part of growing your identity, knowing who you are, and learning to accept who you are.<br />
<br />
I have now been a mother for more than a year. If you've read my posts over the past year, you'll know that being a mom, and doing all the things that moms do, is what now defines me, and I absolutely love that. Being a mom is a tough job, and even though it gets progressively easier through the first year, you don't really know what you're getting into until it actually happens, no matter how much you read about it or people tell you about it. There are many similarities to the things that all newborns do (yes, they all cry, poop, babble), but your emotions, actions, lessons and maternal instincts are unique to you and your child. I didn't know I could love anyone as much as I love Little I, and the best thing is that I can show her all the love I want without even thinking twice (Do I kiss her every three seconds? You bet!). She is the center of our lives, and as time progresses, and she is <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/12/baby-communication.html" target="_blank">learning to communicate</a> better and better, things are becoming more fun. Every milestone in 2015 has been better than the other, and you'll find those outlined throughout <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/search?updated-min=2015-01-01T00:00:00-06:00&updated-max=2016-01-01T00:00:00-06:00&max-results=14" target="_blank">the posts on this blog in 2015</a>. It just seemed kind of impossible back in August 2014 that I would enjoy motherhood as much as I do now, given all the stresses and uncertainties of taking care of someone who needs you so completely to even survive.<br />
<br />
While I've always been a bit of a worrier, becoming a mom has taken worrying to another level. This is perhaps the most negative realization of 2015 for me, and hence, I'm actively working on worrying less. It's hard work <i>not</i> to worry, when every little scrape and bump on your precious little child breaks your heart. We'll see what happens in the next year.<br />
<br />
Going back to work was another tough part of 2015. I almost didn't go back in the first place, but I'm incredibly glad I did. I am able to make much better decisions now in the workplace than I could before I got pregnant - I'm not sure what that's due to, other than perhaps a level of maturity around what's really important in life. Don't get me wrong - work has been unbearably stressful at times this year; so much so that I've wanted to just not go back. At the same time, it has also been very rewarding to work through the tough and busy times and finish the year well enough to take a week off to do nothing but spend time with my family. Family is truly a blessing, and Little I is absolutely the best thing about our lives right now. And that's saying something since our life isn't so bad otherwise. :)<br />
<br />
Fitness has been a challenge this year. I haven't exercised consistently, have gained weight (does that happen every year?), and I've felt much further from fit than I would like pretty much all of 2015. I'd have to actually look through my 2015 blog posts to see if I've talked much about being healthy at all. Time management has been a real challenge this year when it comes to finding the time to work out, eat healthy (this <i>can be</i> a time issue, believe it or not), while doing all the other things I had to do. I definitely did not prioritize health and fitness in 2015, and that's kind of a shame. I am hoping that things will be different in 2016 (is that another thing that happens every year?).<br />
<br />
I have learned once again the value of family this year, and especially the value of having family around you. It's so nice to my one and only dear sister be close by as Little I grows up. She loves her aunt and uncle, and they can't live without her either. It's also nice to have my own aunt and her children around for myself. My parents and R's parents are a part of Little I's life due to the fabulous technology of Skype and Google Hangouts. They can't get enough of our little girl, albeit virtually. I so wish her grandparents were physically closer so she could see them all the time, but that's not the world we live in. <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/01/dear-nana.html" target="_blank">Losing my grandfather</a> this year was a big loss, and I so want Little I to have some good times and make memories with her grandparents. I also continue to work through all the challenges that arise in a marriage once you have a child, along with the joys that you share as a couple. Marriage is a continuous work-in-progress, and so it should be. You're not meant to be with someone who doesn't challenge your ways and help you become a better version of you every day. Some days are not so easy for them either. But you live, laugh, cry and love together to be better.<br />
<br />
In 2015, I read several more books than I read in 2014, and I'm hoping 2016 will be an even more enlightening year! <br />
<br />
Maybe the more things change, the more they remain the same. Maybe I won't lose weight anymore. Maybe I won't change my eating habits as much as I would like. Maybe I won't be less of a worrier. Maybe I will only read as many books or less than in 2015. It won't really make 2016 bad, unless somehow I become a worse person than I was in 2015. I think as we all mature with age, we become more loving, more forgiving, more kind and perhaps more human. Here's to an awesome 2016!! :D</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-51001619923654020422015-12-01T02:24:00.001-06:002015-12-01T02:25:07.891-06:00Baby Communication<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I'm taking a page from Stationary Waves' recent post and <a href="http://www.stationarywaves.com/2015/11/we-can-make-world-better-place-by-being.html" target="_blank">being a better person</a> right now. I'm unhappy about waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to go back to sleep yet again, without having a wakeful baby to blame. So I'm choosing to channel my energy into documenting all the fun things my beautiful little baby is doing these days when it comes to communicating.<br />
<br />
We generally think babies can't communicate because they don't have words. But their sheer genius is that the gift of crying to get their needs across from the moment they're born, in the simple attempt to survive. If you're a parent, you learned the hungry cry, the dirty diaper cry, the pick me up cry fairly early on.<br />
<br />
However, the fun begins when the communication starts to become more mature, with a few words here and there. Little I has become pretty good at baby sign language and it's super fun because it's also a learning opportunity for R & I. I have already learned to sign more than a hundred words and am working on signing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"...haha.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-pUqD6lpNj0YrNE5A2gR_Smqy09QTyUdxs-LZPOLv0JdqGRB-Th2zt1DatRnEcajBcyHKwGm3YwKQiURfGxH7-o1FT2OttabYWKLhSJm9_eOAbhcbmDlPtYAYe6_2POYgZ9FtBxRojaQ/s1600/babysigns31.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="120" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-pUqD6lpNj0YrNE5A2gR_Smqy09QTyUdxs-LZPOLv0JdqGRB-Th2zt1DatRnEcajBcyHKwGm3YwKQiURfGxH7-o1FT2OttabYWKLhSJm9_eOAbhcbmDlPtYAYe6_2POYgZ9FtBxRojaQ/s320/babysigns31.gif" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Source: http://babysignandplay.com/wp-content/uploads/babysigns31.gif</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
While her first word was "Dad," and she can now clearly say "Mom" and a few other easy words, she can actually communicate by using sign language to say she wants to eat, wants milk, wants apples, and even tries to explain to Dad how she saw Christmas lights in the neighborhood, including stars, and "wow" (her actual word) they were amazing.<br />
<br />
Before we had Little I, I had told R that it would be awesome if our baby could sign. I started signing for <i>milk</i> and <i>all done </i>early on, but admittedly gave up because of no reciprocation. I was apparently expecting returns too early because she started asking for milk and signing <i>all done</i> soon after she turned 10 months. They also learn sign language at her daycare, and I think that was a major reinforcement. <br />
<br />
Over the past couple of months, it's as though her brain has made a ton more connections and she can immediately respond to new signs by trying to mimic them. I don't know all the signs they have been learning at school, but I believe this weekend we taught her <i>rain</i>,<i> lion</i>, <i>star</i> and <i>rabbit. </i>She is also doing some signs I don't recognize, which I'm guessing she is learning at school, and R & I try to figure them out<br />
<br />
In addition, she has learned to point out various characters in her books which is so much fun for me. The interaction goes like this: <br />
<br />
<i>Me: "Where's the lion?" </i>[while on a certain page in a book]<br />
<i>Little I: *points at the lion, does a half giggle and half nose puff thing* </i>[because she is so proud of herself]<i><br /></i><br />
<br />
Here's the best part. She actually sees stars in places where I won't even notice and starts signing for <i>star</i>. Then I have to look around and actually find the stars for her to be satisfied. Given that it's the holiday season, there are stars everywhere and she sees them before any of us. Her favorite sign, though, is <i>bubbles</i>, and anything that looks like a bubble is vigorously signed at for acknowledgement, including polka dots on my clothes. She also loves signing <i>cat</i> so Dad will show her cat pictures while she eats dinner. Dogs at the park get a special, super-excited laugh, but she prefers to say "dog" more than sign the word.<br />
<br />
There's a lot of giving back already; her hugs and kisses only get more and more rewarding for us. All the hard work of parenting over the first year seems totally worth it already, and we wouldn't change anything about our little girl. We had so much fun over the extended Thanksgiving weekend that it was difficult for both parents to go back to work today, and for Little I to go to school.<br />
<br />
We are excited for words and more love and giggles to come! <i> </i></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-86121790708000144482015-10-13T20:47:00.001-05:002015-10-13T21:09:49.863-05:00The Rollercoaster First Year<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFVZOKr5wwi6fgU7B0G9VrM_d6ZfVJ9wB9UEsyOsw10ouYMSvJ8KdObW1Cv2KUemjuJSQ_7S3iUWzDaOyBdYpeVWWJDIgg7kwi6EsYaTbQ-qudpS7qHtbiLyzybz66ykWbFswgmib5nfU/s1600/IMG_6679.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFVZOKr5wwi6fgU7B0G9VrM_d6ZfVJ9wB9UEsyOsw10ouYMSvJ8KdObW1Cv2KUemjuJSQ_7S3iUWzDaOyBdYpeVWWJDIgg7kwi6EsYaTbQ-qudpS7qHtbiLyzybz66ykWbFswgmib5nfU/s400/IMG_6679.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Wendy, the owl</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
For 2 months now, I have been trying to write about how my year went as a new mom. The fact that 2 months have passed by is testament to how I have had no time to do much other than be a mom...haha. If you've seen my <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/08/a-very-special-year.html" target="_blank">previous birthday-related post</a>, you know that Little I turned one in August and we had a little party to celebrate her birthday, but I hardly mentioned much about mom's year in that post.<br />
<br />
After Year 1 of being a mom, I now believe the following...<br />
<br />
<b>...listen to <i>your</i> Mom. She knows a few things about being a parent.</b><br />
<br />
Of course, I didn't want to listen to her. She doesn't know how to parent <i>today</i>...she became a first-time mom over 30 years ago...right? Wrong! Many things my mom and my mother-in-law told me over the first few weeks stood true for me. And I can't thank my mom enough for all her help the first few weeks after Little I was born. While <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2014/10/the-first-two-months-part-i.html" target="_blank">hormones were crazy and things were stressful</a>, I appreciated everything that she did to cook, clean, and allow me to recover, while still taking care of Little I when I just needed to sleep for a little. Thanks, Ammu, you're the best!! Although, I am not sure I still buy it that I will forget the pain of childbirth...hmmm...how bad did I say the pain was on that Wong-Baker Faces Pain Scale when I was in labor...? Hmmm. <br />
<br />
<b>...worry less; if your baby is still smiling (or crying)after a little (or big) tumble, they're okay. </b><br />
<br />
You'll never stop worrying completely, but you <i>can </i>worry a little less. I think over the past year, I've become less of a worrier. It's natural to worry - after all, you're now responsible for a human being's life like never before. Like <i>really</i> responsible. You can't just forget to feed them like you sometimes forget to feed yourself; you have to remember to always support their head in the first few months; you have to do everything for them. So when they are hurt or sick, it breaks your heart and you worry for their well-being. But I've learned through this year that babies are incredibly resilient.<br />
<br />
<b><b>...it's hard to let go. </b></b><br />
<br />
<b><b> </b></b>As Little I has slowly gained more and more independence over the past year, from simple things like being able to hold her head up on her own, to taking her first few independent steps, I have found it exciting and sad at the same time. Even in just a year, she is more independent than she was when I gave birth to her, and so she should be. It's hard for a mom to let go, and now I know why my parents still think of me as a kid (as infuriating as that is sometimes).<br />
<b><b> </b></b><br />
<b><b> </b>...dads want to and can do more. </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b> </b>Really, it's true. You may be critical of their timing and their process, but they do want to help. I am guilty of asking for help, but not liking the help I received simply because R didn't do it <i>my </i>way. Yes, I admit, I'm a bit of a control freak when it comes to dumb little things and have given him undue grief about an <i>improperly </i>(?) put on diaper, too much crying from baby during bedtime, or simply not doing enough around the house. But he tries when he can, and volunteered to take on dinner-making duties, which saved me so much stress that I am eternally grateful for that gesture. Doesn't mean I won't complain about things not being my way sometimes, but I really have no excuse to always be in a bad mood. R is also taking on many a bedtime responsibility when all mom wants to do is collapse from exhaustion some nights. <br />
<br />
<b>...daycare isn't so bad after all. </b><br />
<br />
I almost didn't go back to work this year because, after nearly 6 months of being the primary caregiver to my darling little girl, I didn't know if anyone else could take as good care of her; I didn't know if I could live without having her by me every minute. <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/02/oh-guilt.html" target="_blank">I felt guilty about leaving her with someone who wasn't her mom.</a> Here's another way dad helped: we talked and talked and talked about what the right decision was for <i>me</i>. <i>Would I regret staying home after a few years? Would I resent my daughter and my husband if I stayed home when my work life had been going so well prior to maternity leave? Would it be best for Little I if I stayed home?</i> These are not easy questions to answer and they take time, thoughtfulness and much deliberation. Now, more than 8 months into life as a working mom, I am thankful for my husband's sound reasoning and support. Little I was always a smart little cookie, but having gone to daycare, I think she is learning so much more than I could have taught her at home by myself in her first year. I see her blossom every day and it's such an incredible joy. What time we spend together, I want to make sure is quality time, and I know I can still be the best mom I can be for Little I even if I'm not a stay-at-home mom. I have also learned through my own experience and interactions with other new moms, that <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/08/new-lives-and-new-friendships-for-life.html" target="_blank">the decisions we've made along the way have thus far worked out for us</a>. There's an unbelievable satisfaction in knowing that you made the right decision, <b>at least for now</b>. <br />
<br />
<b>...this too shall pass. </b><br />
<br />
Some days, this is the learning that gets me through the day. Remember <a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2014/11/things-im-not-supposed-to-talk-about.html" target="_blank">the things I wasn't supposed to talk about</a>? Well, all the spitting up passed slowly after the 5 month mark, almost all of it was done with by 7 months or so. Now, the occasional throwing up only happens when Little I is sick. It's still no fun to clean up vomit, but hey, this too shall pass. <br />
<br />
<b> ...this is love like you've never known before. </b><br />
<br />
<b> </b>Clearly, this list is not in ranked order because this is my foremost takeaway from this past year. I don't know if this love ever starts to lessen (I should ask my parents...haha), but I know over the past year it has grown exponentially. If I had opted not to have a child for some reason, I would never have known this incredible, overwhelming, <i>heart</i>-runneth-over, inspiring kind of love, and I'm so glad I do. I can't hug her enough or kiss her enough to let her know how much I love her. And the greatest gift is the hug and kiss back!<br />
<br />
<b>...fitness can be a state of mind. </b><br />
<br />
<b> </b>I'm struggling more with fitness than I ever have before (and I think I've struggled with it all my life), and I can't really blame it on the baby. I want to blame it on work and the sedentary nature of life these days, but I think it really is all in my head. I have talked myself into a situation where I feel like I can't control my diet because things get so stressful, I don't have enough time to work out, I have too many other priorities and on and on and on. I don't have a solution to this problem of my state of mind, but hopefully some day I will find a permanent solution. Until then, we keep chugging along and trying when possible to lead a healthy life. <b> </b><br />
<br />
<b>...sleep isn't a sure thing. </b><br />
<br />
<b> </b>Who knew <i>sleep </i>would
be something relative? I went from functioning well enough while waking
up every 2 hours to barely functioning with 5 hours of sleep. Little I
has gone through phases of sleeping through the night, to regularly
waking up once, to regularly waking up twice, and then sleeping through
the night again. She has also gone from being relatively independent
when falling asleep, to needing mom to rock her, to just wanting to play
and play and play until she was too exhausted to fall asleep and just
wanted to cry. I never really know anymore. We have a routine, we follow
it, but each night there's something new. I'm sure this will continue
for a while longer, so I'm not taking anything sleep-related to the
bank.<br />
<br />
<b> </b><b> </b><br />
Well, that's all folks! Hope you have a good night's sleep tonight and, if you're also a first-time mom, I hope your baby and you both have a <i>relatively</i> restful night. :D</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-14682595206507363912015-08-27T22:02:00.000-05:002015-08-27T22:12:16.960-05:00New Lives and New Friendships for Life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMewvWtb3iDvhMQ8yGSIGYwyV-Y5L1wbMBu7Eb0GmYnd_edni15FcqvZwj53df3cign-LuUD-ae91_joAh3hJSBRbzE0SseRK-vBZ4x3hnSESmXaRoxJB7fuCpj0HVCqimKnpe6r48AaU/s1600/IMG_0161.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMewvWtb3iDvhMQ8yGSIGYwyV-Y5L1wbMBu7Eb0GmYnd_edni15FcqvZwj53df3cign-LuUD-ae91_joAh3hJSBRbzE0SseRK-vBZ4x3hnSESmXaRoxJB7fuCpj0HVCqimKnpe6r48AaU/s400/IMG_0161.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
I consider myself lucky to have met several of the ladies you see above shortly before our babies were born, and the remaining soon after. This picture was taken when Little I was about 6 months old.<br />
<br />
Prenatal yoga brought us together, and the lives of our children will hopefully keep us together. Many of my close friends and family from Bangladesh have also had babies over the past year, but none of them live in Texas, so this group has become as good as family. We shared our aches, pains and pregnancy stories in yoga class before the little ones arrived in this world. Since their arrivals, we have shared our new-mom angst and stress, as well as the joys and celebrations of Year 1 milestones.<br />
<br />
Just among the 7 of us, we have so many different ways of doing things, and yet, each of us are raising bright and happy little babies. Some of us chose to breastfeed, others didn't; some babies slept well from the start, others not so much; some started crawling at 10 months, while others were walking; some got teeth at 6 months, while others don't have any even a year later! I value our diversity of thought and parenting styles so very much. We learn from each other every day and are able to do the best for our children, because we are the best parents for our respective child. <br />
<br />
What we do have in common is that all of us are working, first-time moms. It has been equally hard for all of us to have our little ones go to daycare at the various stages over the past year, and many of us have second guessed our decisions to go back (if you read my blog, you know I'm in this latter group). We have all come out of the other end of our tunnel and at this point are very happy with our decisions as we see our babies grow and blossom.<br />
<br />
We've shared tips about homemade food, little baby shoes, diaper creams, eczema treatments, expressed breast milk (supply, pumping, storage, transportation, you name it!), sleep schedules, poop details, and everything that you go through in the first year as new parents! So much changes in this first year, and it's amazing to have partaken this journey with such lovely ladies. I am so very thankful to have them in my life and the babies in Little I's life!<br />
<br />
We perhaps haven't seen each other as much as I would have liked, but we've always known that each of us were around if we needed one another. When I think back to our first postpartum lunch, I laugh at how stressed out I was about the whole newborn-in-heavy-carseat and driving-alone-with-baby-in-the-backseat fiasco. And even that awkwardness was shared by one of these ladies and I didn't feel so alone. Parenting is hard, and being a new mom is super hard because you don't know if you're doing the right thing half the time. To have someone else feel the exact same way as you just makes things a tiny bit less hard, and you thank your lucky stars you aren't really alone.<br />
<br />
It's been fun taking over restaurants with our babies and car seats, and just sitting around talking for hours about our cute little bundles of joy. We are now a core group of new mom friends, who have stayed in touch, shared many experiences over the past year, and I hope to remain friends for life, as we go through the lives of our one and almost one-year-olds! If I say so myself, this group of babies is the cutest I have ever seen and I love them all to bits. :-)</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-8960966949131131802015-08-16T04:19:00.001-05:002015-08-16T04:19:28.373-05:00A Very Special Year <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It's almost 4am and I can't sleep. I'm not so worried about not being able to function tomorrow because, hey, routinely waking up once or more in the middle of the night and not being able to go back to sleep is part of a mom's life in the first year of their babies' lives. <br />
<br />
My little girl just turned 1! Sleeplessness, as mentioned above and by almost every new parent, is the hottest topic of the first year (along with poop, runny noses, breathing difficulties, food allergies, etc.), but there's so much more that happened over this year that I can't cover in this post. <br />
<br />
Little I was born a shining light in our lives and shines brighter every single day that we know her. I marvel at how far we've come, and how far she has come. Some of what I write today might be a repeat of what I've written before, as I've documented each month (or two) of the past year. Until you have a baby, you take every movement you make for granted. It's almost a miracle that babies are born healthy, as abnormalities in cell development can happen at any moment during the nine months of pregnancy. But all the accomplishments and milestones that happen throughout the first year are more than will ever happen again, when it comes to being a basic, functional human being. We learn throughout our lives, but we don't always have to relearn how to lift our heads, vocalize, turn, crawl, walk...<br />
<br />
When I was pregnant, I told my husband that I didn't want to have a big birthday party for our kid ever, and that if I wanted to, he should vehemently tell me not to. Well, as the year went, and as Little I more and more independent, we both thought there was reason to celebrate. So we had a party for her after all. All her little baby friends came and Little I and the babies had a blast!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBdXCtUZn4q6WOI_EdAbIJ_5MGcer48KBPwu5uz1omMeRWe-XuqEKcZFyWGDfoWbSG_joH-x2yTzHGM4nbhVOV52JGsSL9WKMFyncqGvjovPQbIC-shHjTe08rPtSoo7vtFN6PoDZCBxg/s1600/IMG_7274.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBdXCtUZn4q6WOI_EdAbIJ_5MGcer48KBPwu5uz1omMeRWe-XuqEKcZFyWGDfoWbSG_joH-x2yTzHGM4nbhVOV52JGsSL9WKMFyncqGvjovPQbIC-shHjTe08rPtSoo7vtFN6PoDZCBxg/s400/IMG_7274.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLR05y4rDbi84opY6ouJpIQXMQ0WqhVfJxJJ_kq554RuxVSOEElxGDWtWqPPzwpJEqs3Y6eCIcnidBMsOB-zjakheSKdz-vbhg1EjmhRkS8uFxOgfx-mbEkRhAfX-9o3gN00jBlI3xmtE/s1600/IMG_7273.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
<br />
<span id="goog_866203032"></span><span id="goog_866203033"><br /></span>
<br />
<b>Who are we celebrating?</b><br />
<br />
<i>A little girl who</i>...<br />
<br />
...has gone from hating tummy time to now trying to walk - neck strength is clearly no longer a problem.<br />
<br />
...has the cutest little giggle.<br />
<br />
...drops her toys on the ground intentionally and says "oh-oh."<br />
<br />
...loves threads, and is working on mastering that pincer grasp.<br />
<br />
...who gets excited about her water cup, but doesn't actually enjoy drinking water.<br />
<br />
...loves to eat (just like Mom!), and whose favorite food currently is cucumber. <br />
<br />
...loves to have a good time. She partied so hard yesterday that she fell asleep in a guest's arms before everyone left. <br />
<br />
...gives Mom the sweetest hugs, and won't let Dad go to work on her birthday. <br />
<br />
...says "Yay!" and "Good Job" with only hand gestures and claps that her parents are ga-ga about.<br />
<br />
...can't wait for her bedtime stories. <br />
<br />
...loves chewing on everything under the sun.<br />
<br />
...is very concerned when other babies (or even adults) are upset around her.<br />
<br />
...is the apple of her grandparents' eyes. Her aunt, Pichki, also can't get enough of her. <br />
<br />
...can't get enough of her early morning weekend walks with Mom and Dad. She also can't get enough of the after-walk pancakes.<br />
<br />
...adores her favorite owl named Olivia.<br />
<br />
...has a ton of personality.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">A little girl we call nut. A little girl who is ONE whole year old. A little girl we can't help but love and love and love and love..<b>.</b></span><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-32368670368859449992015-07-14T22:17:00.001-05:002015-07-14T22:17:07.549-05:00Leap Frog Through Months 10 and 11<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEO0iMNKzS7885-TiWLEHv3cyP5PvCVYQM-670QZlZm2v0LgemhDAS8kOIPylzc7ogIr0jlHbk99o3gCi2wzA2jBIut5z8LhQCOqpONDTXByKDiZYVHQXQc7KrGhm_TbgO8vKObkzh4wg/s1600/IMG_20150705_111611.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEO0iMNKzS7885-TiWLEHv3cyP5PvCVYQM-670QZlZm2v0LgemhDAS8kOIPylzc7ogIr0jlHbk99o3gCi2wzA2jBIut5z8LhQCOqpONDTXByKDiZYVHQXQc7KrGhm_TbgO8vKObkzh4wg/s400/IMG_20150705_111611.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Little Missouri Fall, Arkansas</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Oh boo, I missed writing a 10-month update on the blog. And I was being so good, too, until about the end of Month 9, and then it all just went off a cliff.<br />
<br />
My ability to keep up went off a cliff, that is.<br />
<br />
Work got hectic, life got busy, Little I got moving and here we are, past the 11th month of life for our little darling.<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a crawler!! :) She is actually more into assisted walking at the moment, and it's amazing how quickly she went from just barely being able to crawl, to super fast crawling, to now wanting to try standing and funny walking. These changes happen in the blink of an eye, it seems, and the little uncoordinated baby that Little I was only 11 months ago is a pleasant, but distant memory.<br />
<br />
And the jokes. She has to be the funniest baby ever! She plays jokes on Dad and Mom, loves a good chuckle, and her current favorite games include the following:<br />
<br />
1. Peek-a-Boo<br />
2. Stick your tongue out<br />
3. Blinking<br />
4. Clapping<br />
5. Hi-Fives<br />
<br />
In that order, too, I think. The teachers at school say she is entertaining, in addition to being the loudest baby in class. This last part is surprising because both R & I are more quiet by nature, but we like to have a good time, and are probably more boisterous around Little I than we are with adults. She demands that we play and have fun all the time, and we oblige.<br />
<br />
In her 11th month, Little I went on her first ever road trip to Hot Springs, Arkansas to celebrate 4th of July as well as Mom & Dads's 5th wedding anniversary! Mom, per usual fashion, was worried about the long drive, but it was a shorter drive than other trips we discussed for the fourth of July holiday, and it seemed like a good compromise. It was actually a perfect distance/time, and Little I had a grand old time looking at the views, playing with me in the backseat, reading, babbling, and taking sporadic naps (same with Mom...hehe...do as baby does, etc.) Arkansas was very surprisingly beautiful, and we had a fun yet relaxing trip.<br />
<br />
We've had some sleep issues since all the crawling and climbing started. Little I wants to spend her time playing and practicing her new mobility skills rather than sleep. I'm also working on (read, struggling with) having her not suck her thumb to sleep as I think it's causing some of her health issues. There were a few weeks of sleeplessness due to a bad ear infection as well resulting in my train of thought with regard to the thumb sucking. It's slow going, taking a lot of patience, and also sometimes heart wrenching (Remember I said Little I can be loud when excited? Well, it applies to her being upset as well!). I do think she is starting to get the hang of it.<br />
<br />
Little I definitely says Mama/Amma now, but mostly when she is sleepy or upset. She knows Dad very well and gets super excited when he comes home from work. Mom is still getting lots of big smiles, and now extra cuddles when Little I is picked up from school. Bringing her home is the best part of my day, every day. I look forward to weekends more than ever before because we get to spend quality time as a family. Saturday morning walks and breakfast out has become a family thing for about 6 months now, and we all seem to enjoy it more and more every weekend. Little I absolutely loves the outdoors! She also loves water and this month has transitioned (finally) from the infant tub to the big tub and had a ball the first day forward.<br />
<br />
She attended her first pool party and the first birthday of a friend in June! So much fun! If only Mom was savvy enough about kids' birthday parties to have known it was a pool party...Dad had to bring Little I's swimsuit from home so she could partake in the fun.<br />
<br />
There are some words starting to be associated with things such as tree and light. Unfortunately, both words sound the same...haha.<br />
<br />
That's already a lot and I know I've forgotten many details. This, however, is where we shall say goodnight, and hope to share some more with you after her first birthday at least! <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1ETL8o_iCyjSfEcquUwWDoyIRrzCR56X-YGhQ-BsKFx3J6nnLFinMXfnbNX2PgbkRznQjO4o2UlZSDY-xU-vcvwqM6ofuDv0C5xe1l_EFb7NLjF5oKGIfgtXBKYcIjz4EF75mJnrjf4Q/s1600/IMG_20150705_111721.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1ETL8o_iCyjSfEcquUwWDoyIRrzCR56X-YGhQ-BsKFx3J6nnLFinMXfnbNX2PgbkRznQjO4o2UlZSDY-xU-vcvwqM6ofuDv0C5xe1l_EFb7NLjF5oKGIfgtXBKYcIjz4EF75mJnrjf4Q/s400/IMG_20150705_111721.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">R carrying Little I up some treacherous slick steps</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-10824514697910490242015-05-20T23:06:00.004-05:002015-05-20T23:08:30.527-05:009 Months of Life on Earth<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Little I spent most of her 9th month on earth having fun with her grandparents on her mom's side. Hurray for grandparents! Now that they have gone back to Bangladesh, it is back to much less time for myself, but Little I was totally spoiled this month! There's nothing like grandparents, thanks, Ammu-Abbu!<br />
<br />
This month has also been spent trying very hard to crawl. We've gone from going backwards, to creeping, to pivoting, to being able to rock on her knees, back to going backwards. She continues to just roll all over the floor to get to where she wants.<br />
<br />
Lots of family visits this month, including meeting with one Aunt and cousin on dad's side! Their trip allowed Little I to learn some fun new games, visit the zoo for the first time in her life. She loved the snakes (!!) and reptiles, but I think mostly appreciated the long nap in the stroller. :)<br />
<br />
She can now do a few things on command like clapping, doing a "touchdown" sign (YAY!!), and is just overall a happy baby who, just like her mother, and true to the name of this blog, loves to eat. So far, she has only rejected chicken...we might have a vegetarian on our hands.:)<br />
<br />
We definitely are aware of how happy our little baby is, and how much she loves being outdoors, but I heard this month that the daycare teachers have a hard time getting her to smile. This isn't too much of a surprise, as we have a serious baby in general, who would rather observe than engage, but it still was a bit sad to hear that for me because it resulted in some more negative feelings about having Little I go to daycare. At least I know she is super happy to see me at the end of each day and I am privy to the best smile in the world! <br />
<br />
MaMa is still a scarce commodity, much to the disappointment of mom.<br />
<br />
Her nightly sleep has been very much punctuated by waking up at least once, if not more. I want to go back to the time she was sleeping for 10 hours at a time! But only want to go back with regard to sleep...everything else is much more fun now than every day before.<br />
<br />
For mom, this month has been challenging, and fitness-wise, we have taken a few mammoth steps back since February when I went back to work. I did get a Fitbit for Mother's Day (thanks, hubby dearest!) so I'm hoping it will motivate me to get moving again. Here's hoping. <br />
<br />
There's so much a baby can teach you, and I never knew that this would be the case even though I've always believed that you can learn from every experience. Babies are super resilient, and while they look to you for queues, they easily get over upsetting situations (this could be because of their short memories), are amazing at comprehending feelings (Little I is very attuned to my physical and emotional state and definitely understands when I'm sick or upset), and are just naturally curious. It is wonderful to see how much they try to learn, and how quickly they learn things. What's even more amazing is how much you and I, as adults, take for granted. We forget so quickly that many of our simple actions, like using our index finger and thumb to pick up things, or the ability to walk, came from a series of (baby)step-by-(baby)step building blocks. As I watch Little I, I learn how much focus and energy it takes to learn how to roll from you tummy to back, or to learn how to prepare to crawl. The high-achiever instinct in me wants her to be crawling and talking already, but I have to catch myself and remind myself that she is building those foundational blocks that will allow her to one day do those things that we can only be thankful to have the ability to do as adults. While I learned in pregnancy how much of a miracle a healthy newborn is, as mother to a nine-month old, I learn how lucky we are to have the physical ability to do so many things we never give a thought to in a single day. <br />
<br />
I didn't necessarily want to end on a serious note, but so be it. Short post, and quite late, but hey, it's up. Goodnight, world!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAvUxXSSnmJHxMh-Iu00CPga99LIrM1kBgRNzdWUB-mowoU8dqC4U0ooEqhWYaZmAQyuyngqcDQgkPiXiNXjwQ5jA8nTgOnB2PiKqOFYZlqfSj07kxMOrxx9gfzx923PbOuJPk41qNAp8/s1600/IMG_20150517_122618.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAvUxXSSnmJHxMh-Iu00CPga99LIrM1kBgRNzdWUB-mowoU8dqC4U0ooEqhWYaZmAQyuyngqcDQgkPiXiNXjwQ5jA8nTgOnB2PiKqOFYZlqfSj07kxMOrxx9gfzx923PbOuJPk41qNAp8/s400/IMG_20150517_122618.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-88719103738646404802015-04-20T22:00:00.000-05:002015-04-20T22:00:01.377-05:008 Whole Months of Cute!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
When I tell people at work that Little I is 8 months old, they seem surprised that the time went by so quickly. Can you imagine my surprise then when this is likely the 8 months in my life that I remember every moment of most vividly? Discount for a minute the fact that it is the most recent 8 months of my life, and so it only makes sense that I have a great recollection of said days...<br />
<br />
My point is: I can't believe Little I is more than 8 months old already! She is still tiny, especially compared to many other babies I see who are her age (or sometimes younger), but she has accomplished so much in her (baby) life! At the risk of repeating myself, I must say that every little skill learned, every new game understood and played, and every new expression is a cause for joy and pride not only for R & I as parents, but also for Little I as she masters her new accomplishments.<br />
<br />
Ms. Master Roller has decided that because crawling isn't happening yet (she has been trying and trying and grunting and trying), she would rather just roll around until she gets to her toy (or Mom) that's out of reach. When we try to "play-walk," her natural state is to try to jump, or hurry up put her feet on the ground but quickly raise them up. It's hard to explain this one, but think of it as a baby's version of a cat running on a treadmill - without a treadmill. I can already see why kids prefer running.<br />
<br />
She learned to play ball with Mom & Dad this month! She passes the ball back and forth with us, and enjoys the game a ton! This is a big achievement, and we're having just as much fun playing with her at this game as she is.<br />
<br />
<br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9KKTlzLd0KTEdUCM4X1ojz52yCOq-oeqZk547RcdgQQBIYen9v3UWv79pWYy0XBTlhl2ZEwXA-_OGY8bXcVHxMR4kUVBP-WamU-xpUWjmPO1uGnmd56E1ntmIqqE3oQpriQIAVas7zWA/s1600/IMG_6858.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9KKTlzLd0KTEdUCM4X1ojz52yCOq-oeqZk547RcdgQQBIYen9v3UWv79pWYy0XBTlhl2ZEwXA-_OGY8bXcVHxMR4kUVBP-WamU-xpUWjmPO1uGnmd56E1ntmIqqE3oQpriQIAVas7zWA/s1600/IMG_6858.JPG" height="267" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A walk with Dad at the Dallas Arboretum</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
Little I has had an appreciation for the outdoors from when she was less than 2 months old, when I started going out for walks at the park postpartum. She has always been an observant, somewhat serious, child, and always curious so parks and gardens just have a lot to offer such an active little observer. She loves being outside, and went on her first picnic this month. <br />
<br />
She seems to recognize people a lot more - even "virtual" people. My parents just came to visit, and Little I seemingly had no trouble recognize her Skype family. Nana and Nanu can't get enough of their first grandbaby!<br />
<br />
Finally, we heard Ma Ma! The Ma sounds are now present, but less often than Ba Ba or Da Da. I think it's only a sound still, and not a name for me, like Dad for R. <br />
<br />
I'm seeing more of my stubborn personality in her already. She's only 8 months! She throws mini tantrums when it's too late getting to bed, or too long for me to dress her after her nightly bath. Everything needs to be right now!<br />
<br />
She is more social than I am, though. She seems to enjoy being at daycare with all the other babies, or in large family gatherings. She does have a bit of stranger anxiety at this point, and will frown at people, but she is more interested in looking at what they are upto than being afraid of them.<br />
<br />
Little I sat in her first restaurant high chair just last week, a week past her 8-month birthday!!<br />
<br />
That's all I seem to be able to recall right now. So much for that vivid memory...</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-14465190767958075962015-03-18T12:11:00.000-05:002015-03-18T12:11:08.361-05:00A Cute 7-Month-Old Bunny<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
Because I can't seem to meet the monthly updates on the dot, some updates may blend into the next month. However, we're within a week of Little I turning 7 whole months, and my updates will likely be close enough.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn1dxFysrXC-CkRIxFP5S4UZbXz2C8UWvyaf-zk946TjAgalAOe1cJDOIrFfiUQyg8fTExLStPmIDlE_y9gRY7976u76qqri7E_1G2o6Gd7FVFUZGOc73s4zLSI-IGlaqQafWRmSJ0328/s1600/IMG_6678.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn1dxFysrXC-CkRIxFP5S4UZbXz2C8UWvyaf-zk946TjAgalAOe1cJDOIrFfiUQyg8fTExLStPmIDlE_y9gRY7976u76qqri7E_1G2o6Gd7FVFUZGOc73s4zLSI-IGlaqQafWRmSJ0328/s1600/IMG_6678.JPG" height="266" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One of Little I's baby books</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Little I's favorite activity can now be officially labelled as reading. This makes me so, so happy! :D I love to read, and she really enjoys reading. She actually has started turning the pages now, and it's the cutest thing. It's like she waits until she can turn the page, but really just want to turns the page the whole time. Her caregivers at the daycare center have commented on how much she seems to enjoy reading. <br />
<br />
She learned how to kiss Mom & Dad this month! Well, they are kind of kisses, as they started off as my face being a teether, but over the past week or so, they've turned into little kisses of affection that are different from how they started. It's super duper cute and she gets so happy to be able to do it. <br />
<br />
If I had been a mother back home in Bangladesh, I may not have realized how important a routine is for babies. While trying to establish Little I's bedtime routine has been a bit of trial and error, we have been consistent with a few things, and I think it has really helped her look forward to bedtime. She hardly cries anymore when she is put down on her bed to sleep for the night, and now she understands enough to know what comes after what, and anticipates things. I don't know if she will remember having a routine, but I know that she appreciates having one, even at this wee age.<br />
<br />
I thought we'd be introducing more formula into her diet, but I'm still pumping enough a day to provide for her meals the next day at daycare. So we will continue for as long as I can handle it. She does have a little formula with her solids.<br />
<br />
Speaking of solid foods, Little I has now had pears, peas, green beans, sweet potatoes, bananas and cereal in her repertoire. She absolutely <i>loves</i> peas. Just seems to enjoy eating her solids a lot, which is hopefully great news for mom, but we'll see.<br />
<br />
Little I is now sitting without support like a boss! She loves to play sitting up, and while everything still goes into her mouth, she seems to be able to distinguish the things among her toys that actually give her teething gums some relief. She loves Mom and Dad to be around when she plays and has lots of smiles for both of us. She is also making slightly more advanced attempts to creep...not sure when the crawling will actually happen, but there's progress toward it. <br />
<br />
I mentioned how her favorite activity was reading, but she does have a few favorite games that R & I play with her. Her favorite with dad at the moment is the sit up/stand up/jump in the air game. Oh the giggles that one gets! And with mom it's a game where her little stuffed puppy toy (Hillary-Willary) gives her kisses or mom gives her kisses in rapid succession...we call it the she-loves-it game.<br />
<br />
A few health updates. Little I had her first cold with fever that required anti-biotics, and just last week had worst eczema flare up to date. It breaks a mother's heart to see her child ill or suffering in any way. Yes, I cried with her as she cried from the itchiness of her eczema, or when she struggled with her coughs. I have also had some surgery recently, so taking care of a nasty eczema flare up while not being 100% fit myself has been a challenge. Thank goodness for all the help that R has been able to provide during these trying few days. Unbeknownst to him, he has now likely become a permanent part of Little I's bathing, moisturizing and bedtime routine! Thankfully, my baby girl is showing good signs of healing and this too shall pass.<br />
<br />
There are so many individual mommy posts I want to write: breastfeeding, eczema care, emotional development of an infant, changing moms, favorite toys and lots lots more! I just don't seem to have the time for those yet, and I don't know when it will come. At this point, the importance is on writing down how Little I is going through her first year, and hopefully I am succeeding a little bit!<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-66554905748179389402015-02-20T12:12:00.002-06:002015-02-20T12:12:48.619-06:00Oh, the Guilt!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I almost upped and quit my job today. Then I felt guilty for wanting to quit: thousands of women are working mothers, why should I not be able to do it?<br />
<br />
The original reason for wanting to quit my job, 3 weeks into being in the office after maternity leave, was the fact that I am not being able to care for my child myself, and she has to be at daycare, on top of which, daycare makes you sick. She has been more sick in the last 3 weeks than in the past 5 months of her life. So there is tremendous guilt there.<br />
<br />
Taking care of a sick child means I couldn't get to my usual dinner-making duties today, so guess what? More guilt. <br />
<br />
Laundry's piling up sky high. The guilt is piling up sky high right along side the laundry.<br />
<br />
I have an accident first thing this morning <i>in my own garage</i>. Car's messed up, garage door is almost non-functional. I want to hit myself upside the head because of my stupidity; I wasn't planning for the expense of replacing the whole front bumper on my car, so the accident made me feel super guilty.<br />
<br />
Then I have to drive my baby daughter in a sub-par car. Guilt around safety.<br />
<br />
Everyday, after coming home, I don't sit down and relax until I go to bed. There's way too much to do and if it's not done, I feel inadequate at keeping house (<i>Where does all this laundry, dust, grime come from?</i>), being a good wife (<i>R should have dinner on the table when he comes home after his super long commute from work, right? If I'm not able to meet this self-imposed requirement, I beat myself up over it</i>), being a good mother (<i>how will she have food the next day if I don't wash the 10,000 bottle parts and pump parts?</i>), and just in my general ability to do things. I'm exhausted, and it feels like right after I'd given birth. Do things get better?!<br />
<br />
<i><b>I wrote most of this most yesterday, and although short, I wasn't sure whether to publish, as, once again, this sense of being overwhelmed is not something us new moms are supposed to think about. </b><b>Now Little I is on antibiotics, after I spent the last 6 months being so diligent about not even giving her infant Tylenol. It's just been a rough week, and I will be happy to just be able to cuddle the fuzzy feverish baby all weekend long. And I'll publish the post anyway. </b></i><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-37716155869835019482015-02-16T14:27:00.003-06:002015-03-18T12:04:01.174-05:00Half Birthday!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Six months ago, I would have told you that six months is a long time. During pregnancy, six months <b>was</b> a long time. However, in baby time, six months goes by ridiculously fast, and the sixth month is so completely fun!<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Since her 5th month birthday, many many new things have happened in Little I's life. I will try to recount as much as I possibly can, for not just my readers' sake, but for my own as this serves as a journal. I wish I could write down every event as it happens, but I don't always get to sit at a computer at home for long enough to write out a blog post. I need that Blogger app on my phone again...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I digress. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Just before her 6th month birthday, Little I may have said her first word, and much to my chagrin (not really, just a little disappointment), her first word was "<b>Dad</b>." Now, we know that she is still finding her voice and her consonants, and has been saying 'Da Da Da' 'Ba Ba Ba' etc., but in this case, I was the one who heard her say "Dad" very deliberately while looking at a picture of R. She repeated it to R later on in the day and several times since, but doesn't seem to do it on command or every time. But we already know she's choosy about her actions. She will likely be choosy about her words when they actually come full force. She is yet to sound out 'Ma Ma Ma'. Wonder what that means...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
If you read my <i><a href="http://iluvtoeat.blogspot.com/2015/02/i-left-my-heart-in-corner-room.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">I Left My Heart in the Corner Room</a> </i>post, you will already know that my baby girl started daycare during this month of her life, as I had to go back to work. My work has been incredibly flexible with my maternity leave, and I am grateful to have had almost 6 months with my baby at home, while most moms have to go back to work after 3 months in the US. Daycare is more difficult for the parents, than it is for the baby at this age. Babies are very adaptable. However, the only big thing that is hard on the baby (and it <i>is</i> a big thing), that I knew to expect from daycare before we even started, is the illness. Two weeks at daycare, and Little I has already had a bad cold, now lasting for nearly 4 days. She also had a fever, but I think that may have been more mom's fault than daycare's. More on that later. The teachers love how cuddly and cute Little I is, and seem to take good care of her, so I'm happy about that.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Baby did her first ever artwork! Of all the babies in her class, I think hers was the best hand-print strawberry...I think she stayed more within the lines and covered more of the strawberry than most. Mom's not biased at all, of course. :-/</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLqJ1iuPDZUsnYUg5Kyt_lDJ5JGoAfM0B0dvgvz5BW8fI447XHZvO9IajCT-TrInK3XmxMyDxfK5a7bsUhQVIxT8HNYh15wJ9-iRRS2MJ9v6Jb4RfPhoHvK2Vw0wE04cb62XWx9-BgR0M/s1600/IMAG1544_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLqJ1iuPDZUsnYUg5Kyt_lDJ5JGoAfM0B0dvgvz5BW8fI447XHZvO9IajCT-TrInK3XmxMyDxfK5a7bsUhQVIxT8HNYh15wJ9-iRRS2MJ9v6Jb4RfPhoHvK2Vw0wE04cb62XWx9-BgR0M/s1600/IMAG1544_1.jpg" height="400" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Little I's first ever artwork</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The day after her half birthday (and technically, this would fall in her 7th month update, but I may not remember...), I noticed her sitting for a few seconds without support, but then she would fall over. Today, 4 days after her birthday, she looked up and gave me a little smile while sitting up, with her hands supporting her, for a little bit longer. It was the cutest thing!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We heard real giggles this month!! :D She liked playing peek-a-boo with me and giggled until she cried. Baby giggles are so, so, soooooo fun!! She also giggled at a song that Dad sang to her which goes "Pants, pants, pants, pants, pants!" And enjoyed being called "Oatmeal Pants" repeatedly...heehee. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Why do you think we called her "Oatmeal Pants"? Well, she tried solids this month, too!! Oatmeal was her first solid food, and she loved it. She did get some on her pants...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
She also tried avocado last weekend (again, technically 7th month update, but solids kind of go hand in hand, right?), but that didn't go so well. Remember the fever that was Mom's fault that I mentioned above? Well, while avocado may be recommended as a first food, Little I's little tummy didn't seem to like it. My own mom thinks I may have given her too much, and also that it might have been too hard for her to digest. We had a fever for a day and then, after some green projectile vomiting, and the fever broke overnight, and she felt much better the next day. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div>
I luckily succeeded in exclusively breastfeeding baby for 6 months, and now I'm okay with her having formula now and then. I give her formula in her extra bottle for daycare, and so far she has only had to have it once. But I'm looking to introduce more to her, just as I did with her oatmeal. Why the heck is formula so expensive?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Little I also went on her first trip to the museum in her 6th month - a treat from her Aunt Pichki (my sister), and her new husband. She enjoyed the day at the Perot Museum of Nature and Science. Will she like science when the time comes? :-) Oh, the parental expectations sure begin early!! I will say, that it's not really an expectation of her - I just think science is fun, and I hope she thinks so, too.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
She loves to play, but all babies probably do. She also loves to observe. Even one of her daycare teachers said that she spent an entire day just watching her friends in class, and wasn't really interested in toys - she just wanted to watch. She is also talking a lot more since going to daycare, and it's fun for us when she comes home, too. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Little I is definitely developing a personality this month. It's a very sweet, happy and cuddly personality at this stage. We love her a bit more everyday!</div>
</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-50746205176890710312015-02-09T15:32:00.001-06:002015-02-09T15:32:07.529-06:00I Left My Heart in the Corner Room<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><img alt="http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/broken-heart.jpg" class="shrinkToFit decoded" height="266" src="http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/broken-heart.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></span></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Source: http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/broken-heart.jpg</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
That's how I felt last Monday, Feb 2, 2015. It was Little I's first day at a childcare center, away from me, away from family, with some (very nice) strangers. I had to ask R to come to drop her off because I knew I'd be a mess. It really helped that he came along, but I still found myself with tears welling up in my eyes as we walked away from her classroom. R & I went our separate ways to work...<br />
<br />
...and I bawled my eyes out in the car. There was an emptiness where my heart usually lies and in the pit of my stomach that I didn't expect to feel. Do all parents feel this way when their children are away from them for the first time? I don't know, but I know I felt like some part of me was missing. It's not like I hadn't left her with others on occasion before this. But this was the first time, in nearly 6 months, that she would be away for me for more than just a few hours. I wouldn't know about her every move. I wouldn't see her every waking moment for an entire day. How was I supposed to take that? I didn't expect the feeling to be as physical as it was. But if you think about it, a physical part of me, my baby who was in my belly for 9 months, my heart, was now in some room with a number of other babies and only 2 teachers. Who was going to hold mine the moment she cried, when there were 5 others crying? I couldn't remember the last time I felt so sad. Possibly, I had never felt so sad, simply on account of the fact that Little I is my first child. <br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>I had to sneak in a lunch visit and feed on Day 1.</b><br />
<br />
Day 2 was only slightly better, but she was still shy and a little bit reluctant to see mom go. But Little I is still too young to understand enough to cry. On Day 3, however, she seemed to anticipate that we were going somewhere fun because she seemed more excited than usual to be put into her car seat. On Day 4, she actually went willingly and smiling to her teacher. I think Day 4 was the easiest for mom because she was smiling when I left. Day 5, somehow, was hard being a Friday - I just wanted to be home with my baby and get the weekend started. That's most Fridays, though, right?<br />
<br />
They say it gets easier. Although, we are home this Monday because the little one had a fever last night, and I didn't want to risk her going to daycare today. She needed lots of cuddles last night! So in terms of getting easier, I think she is getting accustomed to the teachers and the location, and that makes me happy, but I know that there will be more illnesses and my bosses are already expecting more work-from-home-with-sick-baby days. Illnesses are not easy, and I'm not looking forward to them. However, I can't protect my little one forever from illnesses, and they will have to happen. The sooner she becomes immune to them, the better, I guess!<br />
<br />
Just to touch a bit on actually being at work: pumping is a pain, and I would have been a little bit more distracted had it not been for how busy my first week back was - days full of meetings! It was very hard to focus on the first day, especially since I was just thinking about my daughter all day long. I was happy to have the opportunity to leave a little early to pick her up on her first day. <br />
<br />
The best thing so far about Little I staying away from me all day is the
smile she gives me when she sees me in the evening at pick up time. My
baby girl has the sweetest temperament, and her smile is so genuinely
excited and loving when she sees mom at the end of the day, that I can't
help but fall in love with her all over again, every single day. I am
lucky to have a baby with such a sweet toothless grin that I love so
much. It's almost as if she would kiss me, if she knew how. I'm hoping
that will happen soon! </div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-62095765935470556562015-01-26T17:30:00.003-06:002015-01-26T17:30:45.226-06:00Mine Was The One That Cried<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img alt="http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/66/3e/64/663e64c4c2f07b8693346c57c02d2e50.jpg" class="decoded" height="320" src="http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/66/3e/64/663e64c4c2f07b8693346c57c02d2e50.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="320" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Source: Bing Images</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
Another overdue post since we've now been back in Texas for almost a full month, and I am finally writing about our trip. But I meant to record some stuff about Little I's first ever travel, so here goes. <br />
<br />
<u><b>The Good</b></u><br />
<br />
She doesn't know how far she traveled, but for a wee one like Little I, the journey from Texas to Bangladesh to be her first is in itself a great achievement. I'm glad she was able to do that and safely return, largely unscathed.<br />
<br />
Little I got to meet many many people in Dhaka, including my late grandfather, and most people, if not all (simply because I can't speak for all the hundreds of people she met), seemed to think she was a darling. I tend to agree. :-)<br />
<br />
My sweet baby girl slept through entire evenings of wedding ruckus like you wouldn't believe. Huge speakers blaring Bollywood music didn't phase her, nor did the chatter of nearly 800 people at my sister's wedding ceremony. Every evening that we had an event at my parents home, it was loud with all the people around, but that didn't bother Little I - she slept soundly through all the noise, anywhere she went.<br />
<br />
Speaking of sleep, Little I slept surprisingly well while we were in Dhaka. She basically slept from about 8pm to 430am, which was fantastic for her. Not so fantastic for mom given that I was going to bed past 2am or 3am every night. But I was happy the baby was able to get the sleep she needed. <br />
<br />
People on the plane were mostly friendly and accommodating about the fact that we had a tiny wailing baby with us on the long journey. It was very nice to see, and I do appreciate the kindness of strangers on this trip.<br />
<br />
Since this post is baby related, I'll not go into details about the good things about <i>my </i>trip. The wedding was fantastic and a lot of fun...I wish I could have helped more than I did, though. <br />
<u><br /></u>
<u><b>The Bad</b></u><br />
<br />
The journey was awful. She cried a TON! If it wasn't for my only sister's wedding, I would not have made the trip so far. Plane journeys are bad for adults, so you can imagine how a 4-month old felt. She couldn't sleep on the plane, couldn't eat comfortably, and the dry air bothered her as well. A baby that doesn't sleep is a cranky baby, as all moms know. It was also incredibly tiring for R & I because we had to take turns soothing her. During parts of the journey, she cried during any time that she was awake. Sometimes I cried with her. On the journey back, both of us parents had bad colds, and we were suffering along with the baby. It was just not a great situation, and I don't think I am going on such a long journey again with a little child unless I absolutely have to. <br />
<br />
The dust, oh the dust!!! Dhaka, or maybe Bangladesh in general, is incredibly, out-of-this-world dusty in the winter. Little I was affected by it immediately, and her congestion was worse while in Dhaka. I think she was able to sleep simply because, even in the winter, Dhaka is much much more humid than Fort Worth.<br />
<br />
The humidity/dampness also means it was freeeeeezing cold in the house. Because they are cement and brick buildings with no heating, we were all rather cold, especially the baby. Needless to say, there was a lot of layering for baby!<br />
<br />
There were a lot of late nights and some disruption of Little I's routine, which I expected. It could have been worse, as she tended to just fall asleep most times regardless of where we were or how late it was! <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<u><b>The Aftermath</b></u><br />
<br />
I had been dreading the journey and the other negatives of Dhaka so much that I wasn't really prepared for what was to happen when we came back. While the jet lag was worse for R & I when we were in Dhaka, Little I's jet lag, or whatever it's called in Babydom, was not just bad, but I think it basically lasted 3 weeks. She didn't have the full cold that R & I brought from Dhaka, but she did have some of the symptoms of congestion, which made her incredibly irritable. She was waking up every 2 hours, sometimes every hour, during the night, and just needed to be soothed by mom or dad. She couldn't fall back asleep some nights, and we had to have 3am playtime. The late nights for 3 weeks were just too much to bear, but we may finally be settling down now.<br />
<u><b> </b></u><br />
That's our trip in a nutshell. My baby sister is now a married woman and has started her married life with her husband also in the DFW area. I'm glad Little I will grow up with her Aunt and Uncle around. Now if I could only get my parents to move here, then she would have a set of grandparents, too. How neat would that be? :)</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-83432953372537963492015-01-15T22:28:00.001-06:002015-03-18T12:04:16.045-05:00Another Month and Lots of Changes<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVaFK4ZcdaeaJOAO-2NIn3YPM1oVSQXpibKwox54ba8CqL-SbKLCKCfq9RJmG-BK64IH23wRWGEzXT9Y8GsPFTVzFNOatEvLtgLMWUOOBdVI4_HxFGxfQ8Uwj2p9CK3VxECapIt7NDC3c/s1600/IMG_5892.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVaFK4ZcdaeaJOAO-2NIn3YPM1oVSQXpibKwox54ba8CqL-SbKLCKCfq9RJmG-BK64IH23wRWGEzXT9Y8GsPFTVzFNOatEvLtgLMWUOOBdVI4_HxFGxfQ8Uwj2p9CK3VxECapIt7NDC3c/s1600/IMG_5892.JPG" height="266" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The fifth month, and it's like Little I is a whole new baby.<br />
<br />
This month has been an emotional roller coaster for mom.<br />
<br />
Much sad news as you may have seen previously on my blog, and I am still recovering from all the thoughts and emotions that come with a death in the family. Something like this is hard to get over. I am just glad that Little I, in her 5th month of life, met my grandfather, who was in his last month of life. May he rest in peace.<br />
<br />
This month, on Little I's list of accomplishments, we find her rolling from tummy to back and from back to tummy, in a matter of 2 consecutive days! She repeated tummy to back on 2 days, but because she doesn't much like tummy time, it's not something we see often. Back to tummy happens much more frequently, but she's picky about that, too.<br />
<br />
She has also taken wiggling to a different level. One of Little I's many nicknames from me is Wiggleston (because she wiggles a ton, duh) since she was born. But now, she wiggles so much she can actually turn herself around almost 180 degrees. It's fun to watch because she does it when she is excited and happy. <br />
<br />
While she loves all her toys, rattles have taken a new meaning this month, as have teethers (teethes?). She can deliberately rattle, drop, pick up and re-rattle her rattles, and loves the ones that are also soft on one side that she can teethe on. Toys have taken an entirely new meaning for the baby girl - she is in "I-Want-To-Taste-Everything-I-Can-Get-My-Hands-On" mode.<br />
<br />
I intend to write a post separately about our trip to Bangladesh, but it's worth a mention here that Little I's first airplane journey in he 5th month of life for a 15-hour monster of a plane ride from Dallas to Dubai. Her first ever trip away from home was 10 days in Dhaka, Bangladesh. How can an 8,500 mile trip not be an accomplishment for such a wee baby? :)<br />
<br />
Little I is slowly finding her voice, and as the month progresses, she has been changing and controlling her squeals and screams.<br />
<br />
She is also learning how to spend considerably more amounts of time playing by herself.<br />
<br />
Sleeping is another story altogether. Since we got back from our trip, we are yet to have a full night's rest for Little I (or me). I know some of this is because of the jet lag, but I didn't think it would last so long. We will wait and see how things pan out on the baby sleep front.<br />
<br />
I have also gone back to working this month, but from home still. We made a daycare choice that I am actually happy with, even though it meant losing the non-refundable enrollment fee at the one I originally chose due to convenience. The change in daycare center decision was based on the fact that I think Little I will be happier at this new location, and I feel much better about that despite the longer commute to work for me. More on daycare when it actually happens. Once again, we'll see how that one pans out also. <br />
<br />
That was probably a bit more deadpan a post than I had hoped to write. But strapped for time and also fairly tired, this is all I have in me today. Hopefully the next post about the mega trip for baby will be a little more of an interesting read.<br />
<br />
Ciao!</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-67903056011470913842015-01-10T06:21:00.000-06:002015-01-10T06:22:44.874-06:00Dear Nana<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT1-AwDxC2SEpoy-Vqs-CYGW9qYjO_yU_vsBMjh9n2kb5k6sXoeaIt6YWY8NQwjw0XNCAZGF0O9JHS9p6LG-Xpm6z5TbR8snNQas2judURRmPowDMrTjRqjZS3L-XbhnDPtBmvzJNhxEs/s1600/Nana.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT1-AwDxC2SEpoy-Vqs-CYGW9qYjO_yU_vsBMjh9n2kb5k6sXoeaIt6YWY8NQwjw0XNCAZGF0O9JHS9p6LG-Xpm6z5TbR8snNQas2judURRmPowDMrTjRqjZS3L-XbhnDPtBmvzJNhxEs/s1600/Nana.jpg" height="400" width="302" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My Grandfather, December 2014</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
I took a couple of clicks and they were blurry. I said "Nana, why don't you smile?" And then I captured this silly moment that I will now always cherish.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, there are so many things I wish I had said to you in December 2014. Had I known that it was the last time I would see you, I would have spent every possible minute next to you.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, you were there all my life until now. My entire life, there was someone who would tease me and love me and always be goofy with me. And now that space in my life is empty.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, we argued so much all the time. But it was all in good fun, and you always forgave (or I hope). You always loved us more than anyone else ever could.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, the stories you shared in the last couple of years about how you learned English, and how you started your own business were inspiring to say the least. I wish I had spent more time finding out those stories.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, I regret not spending more time getting to know you as a
person. You were always Nana. But behind Nana, there were 80 years of
experience, life, love, pain, and stories that we could have surely
learned more from. You had been more than a grandfather before we even
knew you. <br />
<br />
Dear Nana, I wish you had seen our new house. You would have loved it. You were so happy when you came to our first home in Texas for the first time.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, I am so very happy you met my daughter. You lived a full life, and for your great grandchildren to have known you, however briefly and however young, it is still a wonderful thing to have happened.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, you were one person who made your grandson-in-law from another culture always feel welcome to the family. R & I will forever be grateful for you for that reason. <br />
<br />
Dear Nana, everyone who knew you had a soft spot for you. Very few people in this world can claim that kind of recognition from near strangers.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, I loved your cooking. I loved that you loved to cook and how much you loved to feed people. Cooking was a passion for you, but being able to cook for others was even greater a pleasure for you.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, you were among the most generous people I have ever known. Even when you didn't have very much to call your own, you were still so very giving. That was one thing I always admired about you.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, the tears you shed when watching movies by yourself in the Shyamoli drawing room were a source of mirth for us. It is now too late that I understand why you shed those tears - you were always a loving and emotional man, and you couldn't stand even the pain of fictitious characters because you identified in some way with their sorrow.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, who will fill the void that you have now left in our lives? No one. This void will be permanent.<br />
<br />
Dear Nana, you helped raise 6 wonderful children who miss you, but they have their children to look after them in this time of their crisis. We will try our level best to provide the support they each need. <br />
<br />
Dear Nana, Ryan (Zaman) and I knew you the longest of any of your grandchildren. We were spoiled by you more than anyone else. Ryan and I miss you. I was always jealous, though, of how much time Mayeesha and Tamer got to spend with you and Nanu. They miss you a lot. So do Barsha, Shazreh, Fasiha, Samiha, Shayan, Shadli, Samara and Sophie. Erica, Sanja, Shabab and Shayer also miss you very much. <br />
<br />
Dear Nana, we were lucky to have you as our grandfather. You are so very dearly missed by your dozen grandchildren. <br />
<br />
Dear Nana, I wish I could see you again. But I know you are in a better place. I love you, Nana. </div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-32996729252422528172014-12-16T10:18:00.002-06:002015-03-18T12:04:28.933-05:00An Eventful Month<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7o8OsARfFAkWMmZdTXzQUb8q1edRORbRNX49GIspCyoWzLy09czE6wy2_5YFblp4O-E30k2hWRuf6ufR4GCAZqkcHiuFQVnNElQFf6_ln1dXd6MCs8qeokOMJ-7bAmTHi1EqkOIZOMHk/s1600/IMG_5756.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7o8OsARfFAkWMmZdTXzQUb8q1edRORbRNX49GIspCyoWzLy09czE6wy2_5YFblp4O-E30k2hWRuf6ufR4GCAZqkcHiuFQVnNElQFf6_ln1dXd6MCs8qeokOMJ-7bAmTHi1EqkOIZOMHk/s1600/IMG_5756.JPG" height="266" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Little I turned 4 whole months old on Friday. What a difference a month makes if you're a baby!<br />
<br />
R commented yesterday that he's amazed how she is "less of a baby" already and we had a chuckle about that. Little I has reached a few little milestones this month that have been way more fun for us as parents than we were expecting. In fact, she is so much more fun now that I spent the entire day yesterday talking to her such that my jaws were achy by the evening.<br />
<br />
Grasping, rolling, more extensive vocalizing, better focus and understanding motion are among Little I's many accomplishments this month. Even the spitting up is a lot more manageable and predictable. I can't tell which one is more exciting, but it's amazing how everything is a wonder to little baby eyes. Someone gave us a card that says that we should start to see the world with our baby's eyes. I think I finally understand what it means. Babies can show genuine happiness to see you, and even as adults we don't do this all the time. They don't even know how to talk and we do! Their ability to learn things is a wonder in itself - we taking rolling from side to side or automatically grasping something for granted - we forget, that as infants, these are things we had to figure out and learn as our muscles gained the ability and our brains gained the insights of exploring. <br />
<br />
R & I have been discussing how a lot of people on Quora ask questions on what they should do if they dislike human babies. This is surprising to me only on the basis that I've always liked children. However, now after having my own, and being responsible for raising her only in these first few months of her life, I am amazed at how you learn to love everything about them, what they do, and even how they sleep (yes, I just watch her while she sleeps sometimes...folks without babies: this isn't creepy, trust me!). You marvel at their new skills, and you are as excited for them, as they are to have figured out this or that. It's really hard not to like babies when you see them up close and personal. <br />
<br />
<br />
The only setback in the month is likely what's known as
the 4-month sleep regression (apparently happens at 9 months and other
times also) that is affecting how easily she can fall asleep on her own,
mostly at night. <br />
<br />
Everyday now, Little I is doing something new, and it's a lot of fun to experience as her mother. She tries to mimic sounds, and it's the cutest thing. She also fights to eat a blue bird attached to her activity gym like her life depended on it, and gets <i>hella mad</i> because she can't pull it to her mouth. We think her left hand is her dominant hand, but the blue bird gets a strong right hand treatment. So we aren't sure.<br />
<br />
Her smiles of recognition and play are even more adorable by day. When we play together while making a lot of eye contact, and just by talking, her excitement is palpable, and it seems like she wants to say so much through her baby sounds and smiles.<br />
<br />
Strangely enough, Little I has become my comfort zone this past month. I have been more stressed out than I can remember, which has been affecting almost everything I do, mostly on account of our upcoming journey/trip to Bangladesh later on this week. I am worried sick about anything and everything, and the only time I have been calm is during the day when I spend time with her. Whereas a newborn is a cause for much of the stress in one's life, it's surprising when a 4-month old becomes an anchor to somewhat relieve your stress (despite the fact that it's her that I'm worried about on this trip). Maybe that's a silly way to think of it. Maybe it's just that being with my dear daughter makes me happy and I'd rather just do that in any given moment. I miss her when she is asleep.<br />
<br />
Best thing about this past month is that Little I is slowly growing a definite personality. I'm a little scared she will be too much like her mother. </div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-91423977018012602792014-11-14T18:23:00.004-06:002014-11-14T18:38:23.072-06:00Things I'm Not Supposed to Talk About<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I had a bit of an internal struggle on whether to write this post or not. I'm still struggling on whether to post it or not.<br />
<br />
I have been fully honest in all of my baby-related posts so far. But I haven't talked a lot about the little frustrations. Because you're not supposed to. Having a baby is a wonderful thing, and you love the tiny human more than anything ever, so how can anything be bad?<br />
<br />
Well, that's the point. It's not bad. It's just a tad bit frustrating or annoying. But what is <i>it</i>?<br />
<br />
Today, <i>it</i> was the spitting up. But wait, your baby has spit up basically since the day she was born, so how can that get to you after so long? Oh, it can. It gets to you when you've gone through her entire wardrobe of sweaters, and had to wash all her clothes in case it happens again because you don't want the poor thing to be cold. It gets to you when it's hours after you've fed her, and the spit up still is enough to result in a change for both you and the baby. And you've learned to tolerate your share of spit up stains on your clothes by now. <br />
<br />
<i>It </i>can also be the big blowouts that happen when you go to a restaurant for breakfast, lunch or dinner, whatever you may have managed to get yourself out for after days of staying home. You not only have a screaming baby on the changing table in the restaurant bathroom, but the restaurant will soon have a really nasty set of discarded infant clothes. Thank goodness for the extra plastic bags you packed. But if you forgot to pack them, then that's an <i>it</i> all by itself.<br />
<br />
For my baby, <i>it </i>is often her nose. How many times have I mentioned this already? The baby gets so frustrated by not being able to fall asleep some nights, that it's only normal (I hope) that it gets to me, who is also hoping the baby will fall asleep by the time it's 2am, and we've made several attempts. Last night was one such night. While Little I is generally a good sleeper at night, nights like last night only allow me 2 hours of sleep.<br />
<br />
Other days, <i>it</i> has been my inability to take a shower. I've spent the entire day nursing, changing, entertaining baby, and doing laundry, dishes, vacuuming or something else while she was napping. Then I got frustrated because I didn't take the time to shower. Sorry to have to admit this on a public blog, but such is the life of a mother who is not always so organized at home!<br />
<br />
Sometimes, <i>it </i>is just the feeling of being inadequate/not good enough/not entertaining enough/not doing enough. I'm lumping all these together because this hardly has anything to do with the baby. When I'm feeling that way, anything I do for the baby also feels not good enough.<br />
<br />
<i>It </i>drives me bonkers that sneezing or coughing does what it does post-baby. It makes me swear like a sailor.<br />
<br />
<i>It</i> can also be fear. I will spend an entire week at home because I'm afraid it's too cold/windy/"polleny"/hot/sunny/what-have-you for the baby. And <i>it </i>will drive me up the wall, but I won't act otherwise. Irrational? Yes. Over-protective? Most certainly. Crazy? Possibly. <br />
<br />
So that's <i>it. </i>Or at least some of <i>it</i>.<i> </i>None of this means I love my baby any less or that it's the baby's fault. I know I'm not the infant here and I should be the one in control of my emotions. Alas, I'm only human. And if I'm the only new mom in this situation, so be it: sometimes, it just helps to write out frustrations. If you are also in the same boat, I'd love to hear what your "ITs" are or have been. <i><b>It</b></i> will make both of us feel better, I think!</div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-54832651313820768992014-11-13T12:33:00.001-06:002015-03-18T12:04:50.347-05:00Big Milestone!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IrvSXiS5EHA/VCwu3aMWotI/AAAAAAAAVVk/TE32qBMJ_78/s1600/IMAG0835.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IrvSXiS5EHA/VCwu3aMWotI/AAAAAAAAVVk/TE32qBMJ_78/s400/IMAG0835.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
Well, big one for a little person. :) Little I became three full months old yesterday. How amazing! Three months is long and short at the same time. Let me explain.<br />
<br />
It feels like just yesterday that she was born. It was a whole 3 months ago.<br />
<br />
It feels like forever ago that she was incredibly fussy with tummy aches. It was only 3 months ago. <br />
<br />
So on and so forth.<br />
<br />
They say that the first 3 months are the hardest for a new mom. I am certainly enjoying the last few weeks more than I enjoyed the first few weeks of being a parent to a newborn. I am no longer in pain myself (yes, childbirth is ultra-painful, but so is post-childbirth recovery, nursing, carrying a baby around for hours, etc.), and can enjoy my baby more. Little I is much more interactive, she seems to understand more, she makes cute little noises, and best of all, she smiles all the time. The cutest, sweetest, happiest little toothless smile that neither R nor I can get enough of. <br />
<br />
We have a long way to go, of course. If I had taken the standard maternity leave, I would have been going back to work right about now. THAT is a tough realization. She seems so young, so fragile, and so <i>dependent</i> to just let her go to daycare at this age. But that's what I would have had to do, and that's what most working moms out there are doing, if they are in the US. I requested extended leave from my work, and they were kind enough to grant it, but it's still just going to be so difficult, I don't even want to think about it.<br />
<br />
So, in the spirit of not thinking about going back to work, let's discuss what I <i>AM </i>thinking about on Little I's "3-Month Birthday."<br />
<br />
- She has a long road ahead in life, we hope and pray. At three months, while she doesn't speak, she seems to understand all that she needs to understand to ensure her survival. For example, she may not understand yet that she can breathe through her mouth, but she knows that when her nose is all blocked, if she cries, she's okay. <br />
<br />
- What she doesn't know is that the crying breaks my heart. Her stuffy nose breaks my heart. I am a wimp when it comes to my daughter.<br />
<br />
- This likely has been the toughest 3 months of my life. While it's gone by in a flash, it's been exhausting and rewarding at the same time. Very few experiences in life, if any, can compare to the first three months of being a parent. Heck, very few experiences in life can likely be compared to being a parent, period.<br />
<br />
- In the past three months, I've kissed her head so much that I'm afraid I may have created a dent in her head. Soft spot or Mom's fault?<br />
<br />
- I'm slowly learning that even when she needs me more than she will ever again in her life, I'm still not able to protect her from everything. Case in point: that dastardly nose. I wanted her to have my nose. She did. On the inside. And I can't do anything about it.<br />
<br />
- I love how she smiles at her toys when she opens her eyes and sees them. I hope that innocence and sweetness lasts forever.<br />
<br />
- I had a greater appreciation for my mother after childbirth. After <i>raising</i> a baby for just 3 months, I feel indebted toward her. Wonder how I will feel at her 1 year birthday, in 5 years, 10, 20, 30...<br />
<br />
- Funny how nothing seems as important anymore than the well-being of this tiny little being. <br />
<br />
- I feel like I need to take care of myself better because of her. It used to be just for myself. Now it's important for someone else and she doesn't even know it. I want to be around for a long time for her. Funny that R realized this a long time ago, and would talk about it while I was pregnant also. It took me much longer for that thought to sink in and take hold. <br />
<br />
- While it gets easier after 3 months, sleepless nights can still take a toll on you. Especially if you swore you needed 8 hours of consecutive sleep to function.<br />
<br />
- I'm a different person because I'm a mother. In a good way, I think.<br />
<br />
- 3 months in, I feel like I can write books about love. But I can't write even a chapter about parenting. </div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-80336654095762666712014-11-10T09:30:00.000-06:002014-11-10T09:30:01.920-06:00Self-Doubt and Parenting<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ_cPNyuo1Q2x9E-65hM9HPz4USQu5w_12b1quAvXFqIsef5xM6FNlD5eEjDQz79Q6UsUU8iORONOAeXU4NmvOVvGn43yCCEcGykx1r1hbe7nvjLyXHYtfAeyJkTqCpin5fUKmS0hyphenhyphenEy8/s1600/IMAG0994_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ_cPNyuo1Q2x9E-65hM9HPz4USQu5w_12b1quAvXFqIsef5xM6FNlD5eEjDQz79Q6UsUU8iORONOAeXU4NmvOVvGn43yCCEcGykx1r1hbe7nvjLyXHYtfAeyJkTqCpin5fUKmS0hyphenhyphenEy8/s1600/IMAG0994_1.jpg" height="400" width="300" /></a></div>
This is a hard reality to admit. You think you know best for your child, but as a first time parent, I know nothing about raising an entirely new human being. I can read, voraciously as I have been, but I'm likely not reading enough. I can talk to my new mom friends, but I'm likely not doing things as well as they are. I can coo, sing, love, cuddle and soothe, but I'm likely not doing it the right way.<br />
<br />
The other day, I was at the gym, and I'd basically rocked Little I to sleep in her car seat, at the gym child care room after getting there. The child care was closing in 40 minutes, and I told the caregiver that I'd only take 30 minutes today anyway. Each and every one of those 30 minutes I spent watching for the caregiver to come tell me Little I needed me. This, after I knew I had just fed her before we got there, and she was going to give me at least 30 minutes of a nap.<br />
<br />
<br />
"<i>But she might wake up because of that darned congestion</i>."<br />
" <i>What if she needs a change?</i>"<br />
"<i>Should I have left the car seat uncovered so the sitter could see if she was awake?</i>"<br />
"<i>What if some other kid is screaming and she wakes up?</i>"<br />
"<i>The sitter is walking this way. Is Little I up already?</i> <i>Does she need me?"</i><br />
<br />
30 minutes of such questions. 30 minutes of guilt. 30 minutes of worrying that I'm not being a good mother by leaving my daughter in a room full of strange, germy kids, with a stranger, when she isn't even a full 3 months old yet; hasn't built up a good immune system yet; has trouble with her nose and can't always fix it herself; she will cry and I won't even know..............<br />
<br />
You see a pattern of guilt, doubt and uncertainty? And this is a few weeks after I had already been going to the gym, having started by leaving her at home with her father safely on the weekend the first time I went. Almost every gym session is like this. I'm working on just relaxing during my workout, but it's an uphill battle.<br />
<br />
The gym is just one example. I'm going through this on a daily basis at home. As I read the books, I'm wondering if I'm doing enough to help her brain development, muscle development, eyesight development, vocabulary building (she is THREE MONTHS old!). Is she eating enough? Am I loving her enough? Am I loving her too much? Is she sleeping enough? Will she learn to sleep on her own? Will she actually be independent? Will she be secure in who she is? <i>Will she be happy</i>?<br />
<br />
Goodness, it's endless. My father-in-law joked the other day that we'd gone and done it now - we'd given ourselves a lifetime of worry by having a child.<br />
<br />
I hope it really was a joke.<br />
<br />
In all likelihood, this is probably just the beginning. At this point, I'm hoping that somewhere along the way, I become comfortable that I was a good mother to Little I. <b><i>That</i> <i>Little I turns out to be a strong, independent and happy girl, woman and mother herself some day. </i> </b><br />
<br />
And that her nose sorts itself out...<br />
<br />
And she eats enough...<br />
<br />
And...<br />
<br />
And...<br />
<br />
And...<br />
<br /></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-21577841219636982222014-11-08T09:00:00.000-06:002014-11-08T09:00:03.474-06:00Post-Baby Fitness - What's Possible?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img alt="http://cdn.girlsgonesporty.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/mom-and-baby-fitness.jpg" class="shrinkToFit decoded" height="332" src="http://cdn.girlsgonesporty.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/mom-and-baby-fitness.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Source: http://cdn.girlsgonesporty.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/mom-and-baby-fitness.jpg</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
Every mom, every baby, every situation differs in whether or not it's possible to get back to where you were physically before your pregnancy. I got lucky and lost the baby weight within the first 2 months from breastfeeding, and then decided to go back to the gym and walk to just generally stay healthy and fit, in addition to trying to get some much needed muscle tone back. Time with an infant, however, is at a premium, and it took a lot of doing to get to the gym.<br />
<br />
<b><i>Exercise is always possible</i>. </b>You don't need a lot to exercise when you think about what constitutes exercise. If you are able to walk fast, you're exercising. If you're able to do some squats while baby is asleep, you're giving your legs a workout. Crunches take minutes, as do chair dips, jumping jacks and burpees. And not one of these things require a gym, weights or any equipment.<br />
<br />
<i><b>Motivation is hard to come by</b>. </i>A friend of mine said on a recent picture I posted on Facebook that she wishes she had half my will and motivation. I was flattered because I have to work <b>really really </b>hard to motivate myself to get to the gym or do any of the things that I just mentioned above, without a gym. So my friend isn't alone when it comes to lack of motivation. My husband will attest to the fact that I'll stay in my PJs all day if I could, and with a little one, it's easy not to even have the time to take care of yourself. Sleep often takes priority over getting up and doing some squats or crunches. But so do dishes, vacuuming, laundry, sweeping...<br />
<br />
<i><b>Prioritization is important.</b></i> My uncle advised me: when baby's asleep, you should sleep, too. That's fantastic advice because sleep deprivation can cause problems for the mother, and mom's health is important if baby's health is important. Here's the key: <span style="color: #20124d;"><span style="font-size: small;"><u><b>Mom's Health Is Important</b></u></span></span><i>.</i> I am a very strong believer in this. If my kitchen isn't spotless right now, it will not make a difference to whether I can physically take care of my daughter. If my knees hurt because my quads aren't strong enough to take the repetitive sitting and rising required for breastfeeding throughout the day, we have a problem when it comes to taking care of my daughter. So I need to constantly prioritize to make sure I take care of my health. The kitchen will eventually be clean.<br />
<br />
<i><b>It's not all or nothing.</b></i><b> </b>Last week, I made it to the gym 4 our of 7 days, including the weekend. This week so far, I've made it once. Last week was smooth sailing, while this week has been a little bit more stressful with Little I and I haven't felt as motivated because of weather on some days. I also had a few social things I wanted to do. Everything is relative. While last week was a good week fitness-wise, this week, I feel bad about not having made more of an effort to exercise at home. On weeks like this, I spend a lot of time feeling bad about it. I'm working on remembering that it's not all or nothing. That last week's efforts at fitness count, and that I still have two days on the weekend to go to the gym. <br />
<br />
Really, <b>anything is possible</b>. It just depends on what's important to you. For me, it's important to be healthy myself so I can make sure my daughter values health and fitness. I know I will struggle with the healthy eating side of things more than the active lifestyle side. We will just have to take each day as it comes. So far, it seems to be working. Let's hope it continues to work, and I'm not just fooling myself. </div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3350687171581439259.post-28058750414415291522014-11-07T08:24:00.001-06:002014-11-14T18:34:41.349-06:00A Tiny Little Personality<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8cvp5bUP_yk/VEUPbyg5SeI/AAAAAAAAWGg/yfsKsiMWGdY/s1600/IMG_5662.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8cvp5bUP_yk/VEUPbyg5SeI/AAAAAAAAWGg/yfsKsiMWGdY/s1600/IMG_5662.JPG" height="266" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
She smiles good morning with the happiest toothless grin I have ever seen.<br />
<br />
She crinkles her button nose when she smiles.<br />
<br />
She thinks her pink haired doll, Dolly (I know, genius name...Mom is so original), is her best friend. Rattles, the zebra, is just there to help her fall asleep. <br />
<br />
She likes to sleep to Vivaldi's Mandolin Concerto.<br />
<br />
She "helps" on the changing table.<br />
<br />
She <i>loves</i> the changing table. This one I don't understand. <br />
<br />
She doesn't like socks. Or shoes.<br />
<br />
She frowns when concentrating.<br />
<br />
She doesn't like being constricted. <br />
<br />
She likes her crib better than her bassinet. <br />
<br />
She doesn't know what love is, but grabs on tight to be close to Mom or Dad.<br />
<br />
She still loves black and white, at 3 months of age.<br />
<br />
She has the brightest, most beautiful eyes, that already express so much.<br />
<br />
She has a hungry cry, a hurt cry, a sleepy cry and a pick me up cry.<br />
<br />
She keeps one eye open to see if Mom's going to put her down. <br />
<br />
She's a total wiggler.<br />
<br />
She loves reading already. <br />
<br />
Hard to believe she has been in this world barely 3 months.<br />
<br />
<b>Updated with things I forgot, from Little I's dad:</b><br />
<br />
<i> <span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$4:0">She asks dad for help with her eyes when she's upset.</span><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$5:0" /><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$7:0" /><span data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$8:0">She'll keep looking up as she falls asleep to make sure someone's there.</span><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$9:0" /><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$11:0" /><span data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$12:0">She tries to laugh, but she hasn't yet figured out how.</span><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$13:0" /><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$15:0" /><span data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$16:0">She likes water.</span><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$17:0" /><br data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$19:0" /><span data-reactid=".bi.1:3:1:$comment10154787243410641_10154787519415641:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$20:0">She smiles hello, even when she's upset. (Dad loves this about her.)<!------></span></span></span></i></div>
pebblesiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03367260407493627301noreply@blogger.com0